LOVE || so hard to find one.

My peer group is moving into the marrying/settling down age, and while some of my friends are getting serious or getting married, there are still a good number of us who seem and feel far from it. I read article and article on how it's really hard to be a Black woman and find a successful Black man who is not intimidated by all that she has accomplished. Then I found this: "I'm Black, Single, and Insulted." I really enjoyed her take on the statistics about Black women not marrying -- and the idea that women who put their success first, know that they are focusing on their careers at that time.

On the other side, there was also this which was linked on Twitter" The post is a very candid look at reasons why it seems hard for a woman to find a match in a mate. "Women Don't Intimidate Good Black Men."

I really think it's a blend and there are a myriad of reasons why we're not marrying at faster rates. What do you think about it?

LOVE || don't need a love song. . .

I was listening to the radio a while ago and they were discussing why women of color don't get married, or asked to marry. Different thoughts were thrown out including men not knowing what kind of woman they'd like to marry. On the other hand, it was pointed that women have no idea of what kind of person they'd want for a life partner.

I used to say I don't know what kind of man I'd like in my life, but I think it's a bit clearer now. It is interesting that what I'd want in a guy is what I'd like in any friend.
So here's my list. He should:

• Be funny
• Be genuinely nice
  
• Be supportive of my goals and have goals that he's working on that I can be supportive of in return
  
• Be open to new experiences, places, people, things.
• Be interested in and appreciative of different forms of art.
  
• Always be willing to learn something new.
  
• Be more doer than talker. Life is short, talking about things can go on forever.
  
• Be funny. Again. I love a good sense of humor.
• Be a great conversationalist. I love exchanging ideas.
• Find that being involved in the community is important and find a way to be involved. Large or small.
  

I don't think that list is too long. I mean, I can go on with even more specifics, like him liking coffee shops or posh bars for dressing up and chatting, or cooking, or other smaller thingsbut that's neither here nor there. So that just about sums it up.

Does anyone else have a list?

Thanks for reading.





*Listening to N.E.R.D. "Love Bomb" *